We have all heard the barrage of information regarding the G-Spot. Tipped as the pinnacle of women’s pleasure, this is very much an area of the body that most women in their lifetime will try to find and conquer. Many won’t succeed… or will certainly take a good long time to find success. Whilst I did not spent years trying for a G-Spot orgasm, I understand the desire and (sometimes) frustration in wanting to experience something that sounds so awesome.
On my first version of this blog (this is my second version – full explanation here), I wrote a post about my first G-Spot orgasm when it happened at the time. Someone (the lovely CherryIntimates) left a comment on that (now deleted) post which intrigued me. She mentioned she had had clitoral, internal and anal orgasms, but never a G-Spot orgasm. Have you picked up on what I did when I read that? She classed “internal” and “G-Spot” orgasms as different things. This confuzzled me a bit. I always thought G-Spot orgasms were internal orgasms. Cue research and me starting a thread on the Lovehoney Forum asking for some clarification on this seemingly minor detail. Of course, I know labels don’t matter. Pleasure, in whatever form you can have it, is wonderful and it doesn’t matter which type of orgasm you had that day. However, I think the reason this stayed on my mind, the reason that this idea that there was more than just the G-Spot orgasm plagued me, was because I knew that sometimes the “G-Spot” orgasms I sometimes experienced seemed different from others. The way I reached some of those orgasms, and the position inside me where they originated from, didn’t fit with the information I had heard from multiple sources about how a G-Spot orgasm should be done. And so, dear reader, after much research – and experience – I introduce you to the A-Spot.
Now, I know this sounds like another one of those Cosmo gimmicks, but I can say with absolutely clarity this is a real thing. Because I have experienced two different types of internal orgasm – I can clearly feel the difference – and those two types exactly fit the two generally-agreed descriptions of the G-Spot and the A-Spot. In order to better understand the difference, I’ll tell you all I know about both, from a biological view, from the process you can use to have an orgasm from these two points inside you, and from my personal experience of what each orgasm feels like.
*I am no scientist, this is all information I have gathered from online research*
This is an area located around 2-3 inches inside the vagina. It is positioned on the front (anterior) vaginal wall i.e. at the roof of your vagina. I have never been able to find it with my fingers, but it is meant to feel rough, like a walnut I think I’ve read, and is supposedly around the size of an American quarter. It has been referred to as the female prostate, but I’ll just stick with calling it the G-Spot. Technically, its existence has not been scientifically proven, having evidence both for and against its existence. As a female who can definitely feel distinct differences in the three types of orgasm I have had (clitoral, G-Spot and A-Spot), I am 100% sure it exists (feel free to debate with me in the comments!). It is also potentially the source of the fluid that gets released during squirting, but having never squirted before, I have no opinion on that claim. You don’t have to squirt to have a G-Spot orgasm, I definitely know that. There is also the theory that the G-Spot is merely an extension of the clitoris internally, which I think could indeed be true, since your clitoris is actually meant to be the size of an aubergine inside you, plus they appear to both be made of similar erectile tissue. It still gives a different sensation to the external clitoris though.
This is an area located right at the back inside the vagina, near the cervix. There is debate on its exact location, but from what I’ve felt in my own body, that position seems about right. You aren’t going to reach that far back with your fingers, so won’t be able to feel it with your hands, and I can’t really find anything that describes its feel. This area’s potential for orgasm is even less scientifically proven from what I’ve read, and main research has been in regard to stimulation of this area helping vaginal lubrication, as opposed to orgasm. Due to the subjective nature of what orgasms feel like, and where they come from, research hasn’t really proved anything, with some women saying it feels just like a G-Spot orgasm, and others saying they can tell a distinct difference. However, we can’t say for sure that these women were definitely having A-Spot orgasms at all!
METHOD(S) FOR REACHING ORGASM
*I would like to point out that, hey, I am only human and have not managed to learn how to orgasm in every position in every situation at the drop of a hat. There are only certain positions that work for me thus far, so I will tell you what works for me. If you have your own special way, feel free to let me know in the comments!*
I prefer to use toys with a bulbous head, and usually made of a hard material like glass, for this stimulation – it takes so much less effort that way! I find it easiest to have a G-Spot orgasm on my back during self-pleasure. I have only had one G-Spot orgasm in another position (if memory serves me right), which was one time with a suction cup, average-sized dildo with me bent over in a doggy-style position. I don’t know why it worked that time, but it did :).
Anyway, my general process is to insert the toy only a few inches in – maybe around 4 inches – whilst I am laying on my back with my legs open. I push the head of the toy up onto the roof of my vagina and thrust. The basic idea is to try and apply pressure with each thrust. I don’t fully thrust in and out, the toy remains inside me to some extent the whole time. It is actually more of a diagonal movement – I try to thrust up and down, but also in and out, so it ends up in kind of a diagonal direction. With this thrusting, you should feel something. Something that makes you think “ooh”. If you don’t, try thrusting onto different bits on your vaginal roof until you hit something that makes you go “ooh”. If you have to go really far back right into the back of your vagina though, that is where you start hitting the A-Spot, so try to make sure you’ve tested nearer the front first. I find with repeated pressure, you should start to feel a “build”. You know like with a clitoral orgasm (I assume you do) where you can feel the “build”, it is similar to that, where instinctively you just know. With more build, I like to try to open my legs wider whilst I am thrusting – I don’t know why this works for me, it just does.
A really good indicator of if it is working is if you can feel any swelling, or additional tightness, inside, especially if it feels like you have to push less hard to reach or stimulate it. Just persist, just keep applying pressure, don’t be afraid to be hard with that pressure (that’s why I like hard materials like glass to do that pressure for me). Hopefully, if you are in the moment, if you are enjoying the sensations, it will happen for you!
The only way I have managed to have an orgasm of any type during penetration with a partner is in cowgirl position (not that I mind, I have a darn lot of them!), so I can only comment on that.
Basically, during cowgirl, when you are bobbing up and down on him, you need to try to do the self-method above, whereby you try to bob on him at an angle that hits you right. I actually find it best to lean quite far forwards (towards him) and push up and down so that the penis is in an almost horizontal position when it enters. Try to think about it (in fact do it now!): lean forward and the roof of your vagina has curved further backwards and is more horizontal than if you are sat bolt upright, but is still slightly curved up. Therefore, if a straight penis comes into you at a horizontal angle, it should hopefully hit the slight curve, which is approximately where the G-Spot is (I’m sorry if I’ve confused you, feel free to ignore that dire attempt at an explanation!).
This doesn’t always work, mainly because I just find it easier to have an A-Spot orgasm (more below), so tend to give into that, but I know when it has worked because I can feel myself getting tighter, but not drier, clenching him more, but not putting up resistance. He can feel it too. And then hopefully you can tip into a fabulous orgasm!
I have never had an orgasm through fingering alone (but I still find it strangely addictive and adore it!), but apparently a “come-hither” motion with the fingertips is meant to work. Plenty of advice about that can be found through Google, so look it up, I don’t want to make out like I am an expert on that method.
This method I think is so much easier than the G-Spot method! Toys that are hard and with some sort of head or curve are slightly easier to master this with, but I have done this with all types of toys: slimline, flexible, hard, chunky – it really doesn’t matter all that much, due to the way I do it. Again, this is mostly whilst I am one my back, however, I have had plenty of blended orgasms (i.e. internal orgasms with a bit of clitoral help) whilst bent over, knelt up and riding a chair. The clitoral help I’ve referenced is usually minimal, I’m talking literally the edge of my fingertip pressed, not even moving, on my clit. I can assure you these aren’t just clitoral orgasms, because I can definitely tell the difference in the way I orgasm.
Anyway, my basic process is to insert the toy as far inside me as I can. And thrust. Right into the back of my vagina, as far as I can. And that is basically it in a nutshell. “That’s your big method?” you say. But seriously, that’s all it is. But when I say thrust as far back as you can, I mean it. Like go as far back as you can until it’s painful – obviously pain means it’s too far. And just keep going with the thrusting. Speed depends on the toy, just find your own speed would be my advice.
I find this one has less of a “build” than clitoral or G-Spot orgasms, so my advice is to basically keep going until you get bored, because the tell-tale signs aren’t as obvious, at least not for me. It might creep up all of a sudden, so don’t lose heart if you can’t feel anything immediately. These orgasms do happen relatively quickly though I find. And they are fabulous for having more than one.
Unlike with a G-Spot orgasm, nothing appears to swell inside, it all seems pretty much normal. I’m making it sound like a bit of a boring orgasm here. I can assure you it is not, it still feels great before the orgasm, like I said, it just doesn’t have the same “build”. I think this is to do with the clitoris and the G-Spot being made of erectile tissue, which will swell and build before climax, but the A-Spot just seems to be the back of your vagina and just made of average vaginal muscle. Don’t quote me on that though!
Once again, this method is for during penetration with a partner in cowgirl position. Basically, during cowgirl, when you are bobbing up and down on him, you need to try to do the self-method above, whereby you push down as far as you can. It shouldn’t matter what angle in particular, just whatever angle will get him as far inside you as possible without being painful. I tend to like being properly vertical and upright best. This way you can also get a bit of help clitorally if your lady bits are being a bit stubborn. I do find though that you can start off with clitoral help, and then proceed to just have internal stimulation alone, and it will give you a full A-Spot orgasm in the end without clitoral interference.
I do find this method easier than G-Spot stimulation, purely because it is less precise – it is more of a “do it as hard and as far inside as you can” and it tends to work. I once had 6 of these in like 30 minutes – these don’t make you numb in that area (think it’s to do with the whole erectile tissue/vaginal muscle difference) and I don’t tend to feel like I can’t have any more (though after 6 my body in general was pretty worn out!). Totally try it out, it is actually really easy to master really quickly.
I do not know of any particular methods other than the ones that work for me.
HOW THE ORGASMS ACTUALLY FEEL
*I’m going to include clitoral orgasms here for comparison*
I like to think of clitoral orgasms as more “violent” than the others. They are very much strong and sharp, but occur for a quicker time than internal orgasms. They have a very definite build-up time, where you can actively feel the blood flowing to your clitoris and almost making it warmer. It makes my legs, my knees especially, tense, and my bottom, but the focus point for this tends to remain just in those areas. The tension is quite strong though, and I tend to tense hard but for only a second or two for each clench during the climax. Someone once wrote, which I thought was a good way of looking at it for comparison, that clitoral orgasms are external ones, which then flow inwards, but will only reach so far before they dissipate (i.e. why the tension is focussed around the top of legs and bottom area, because the orgasm has dissipated before going in any further).
I like to think of G-Spot orgasms as the middle ground between clitoral and A-Spot (though maybe 2/3 of the way closer to an A-Spot), because it combines the build-up of the clitoral orgasm, but from the inside of the vagina like the A-Spot orgasm (albeit closer to the outside than the A-Spot). It is of a less violent, slower nature than the clitoral orgasm, but does not lose its intensity, it is just a different type of intensity. The tension is once again around the legs and bottom, but I also find it spreads further up my torso, towards my midsection and sometimes in the shoulders slightly. The tension isn’t as violent, but is a deeper tension, with each clench lasting around a second and a half longer than clitoral orgasms. In my vagina though, it still remains a “violent” clench, just a longer one. The pleasure feels a bit asymmetrically balanced inside my vagina, because nearly all of the pleasure is focussed on the inside roof of my vagina, and none has really originated from anywhere else in my vagina. You can feel that the clench has originated from a different point than a clitoral one too. During penetration, the swelling of the G-Spot inside has actually caused me to push out my partner during climax. This is the orgasm that my partner can really feel me having. G-Spot orgasms are internal ones, which then flow outwards, but will only reach so far before they dissipate (i.e. why the tension is focussed around the top of legs, bottom and mid-section area, because the orgasm has dissipated before going any further out).
I like to think of A-Spot orgasms as the least violent and slowest of the three. In terms of a whole body experience, I would actually class it as the most intense. The tension goes into my whole body, I can truly feel a full body clench. The tension is the deepest tension, it really feels like it is at your core (which of the three, it is indeed closest to your core, since it originates from further inside your body). In my vagina though, it is no longer a violent clench, just a firm one, but it is a darn long one. It feels truly satisfying, because your whole body has gone through this pleasurable tension. It makes your body feel whole and at peace. My vagina feels completely and wholly pleasured in a way that a G-Spot orgasm doesn’t totally do, because the A-Spot orgasm grows from a point where basically the four walls of your vagina meet, whereas the G-Spot focusses more specifically on the roof. You can feel that the clench has originated from a deeper point inside you. A-Spot orgasms are internal ones, which then flow outwards, but will only reach so far before they dissipate , but because of the nature of the clench, and the deeper origin, it manages to flow outwards to the whole of your body – honestly I’m sure I can feel it in my brain more than the other types! These are the orgasms that make me especially jelly-legged and light-headed.
…And there you have it. These are my different experiences of pleasure, put into words as best I can. Of course, sexual pleasure is purely subjective, and there is actually no need to put a label on any of the experiences that happen to you during your discovery around your body, but it sure is fascinating right? Plus, if this post gives even one person more clarity on their own sexual experiences, or gives them the opportunity to try out a new technique that results in amazing pleasure, then I feel proud! The human body is such a wonderful thing, that features so much potential for natural, basic pleasure, that it astounds me that there is not more research out there being done towards unlocking the mysteries our bodies hold. This post was not written to make anyone feel inadequate or like their experiences are somehow not enough – I adore all types of orgasm, I think they all have their place and wouldn’t argue with getting to enjoy any of them. That doesn’t mean to say you cannot try to build and expand on your sexual repertoire – variety is the spice of life after all!